Re: Cycling a Refugium

[mfisher2112]

I was going to let this go, mods and officers, pleaes forgive me and feel free to take any action you deem necessary, but I feel it needs to be addressed.

Carlo, don't take it personally. I'm sure everyone, including myself, appreciates your valuable input from years of experience. Truly. However, sometimes it's the approach more than the intent. Printed text is difficult to convey thoughts and opinions the same as it would be in a verbal face-to-face conversation. Alot of times inflection and emotion can offset what can come off otherwise as (and don't take this the wrong way) condescending (sp?) and even pompous.

I'm sure you have no intention of sounding that way, but you seem quick to offer your "opinions" as cold hard fact, and just as quick to correct others who have differeing opinions.

Your opinions and experience are welcome, especially to someone like me who has only been in the marine hobby since May. But keep in mind, sometimes the way your posts come off is a bit off-putting (if that's a proper word combination).

I'm sure you're knowledgable, but so are others. And it seems that if your knowledge or experience differs from others, you are quick to dismiss the opinions of others, and impose yours on top as the correct line of thinking.

I dismissed it the first time as me just overreacting, but this is the second time you have dismissed my opinions directly, and I've witnessed you do it to others.

As I said, I'm sure that wasn't your intention, and I don't want to start a big to-do over something silly like this, but please bear in mind that the way you are perceived is often that persons reality. I think everyone benefits the most when the club can debate issues, offer opinions, and openly "think" through problems, but we all need to be sure we are doing it in the most productive way possible.

I avoid posting on a good number of technical issues because I don't always know the answer, but I can tell you more will avoid posting a second time when they are pretty much told their answer is wrong.

Hopefully you don't take my post the wrong way. I have tried to word it the most delicate way I could. Please continue to offer your advice and experiences, but try to consider others in the way that you do it and give more consideration to the way it may be perceived.

 

[Carlo]

mfisher2112,

Of course I'll take it personally. But not in a bad way. I didn't realize I was coming off condescending or pompous. Surely that was not my intention. I'm a down-to-earth guy who basically gets along with anyone/everyone.

Anything anyone posts here is "opinion" unless you footnote it or quote it from known existing expert or text in the field. I'm not sure what you are referring to about correct others with a differing opinion. I don't recall ever correcting anyone, maybe adding more information to the thread but not correcting.

I hardly ever just dismiss the opinions of others unless it's just plain wrong information or severely goes against what most people would think as being accurate. I've never intentionally tried to "impose" my own thoughts/actions as the correct way of thinking or doing something. My intention is just to show other ways of doing things usually with the idea of doing it cheaper, saving money or by making the least amount of change (shock/stress) to a system as possible to get the job at hand done.

I replied to your other message about the "obvious expert" because I'm not an expert nor do I claim to be. I'm not a biologist, chemist or other expert. I do have a lot of knowledge and I'm learning a great deal more all the time. I volunteer time at Adventure Aquarium and I'm learning even more there. I take classes when offered on a variety of things and try and take what I know and have learned and share it with others who don't have the opportunity to do the same.

Even the "experts" are hard to follow. Take for example the experts who say deep sand beds are the way to go. Other experts say NO, thin sand beds are the way to go. They're all experts but each contradicts the other and show "their way is correct".

I'm not sure what you mean by I dismissed your opinions directly? Was it the comment about bacteria? If so let me explain slightly more. Bacteria is in the water column, on/in the rock, on the sand, on the tank glass, basically everywhere inside the tank. However, lb per lb you will find most of the bacteria on and in the rock. The rock itself Is very porous and has so much surface area compared to anything else in the tank that this only makes sense. It has areas both with and without oxygen so it can foster both types of bacteria that break down the ammonia-nitrate cycle. It's because of the "filtration" effect of the live rock (and it's surface area) that people usually say bacteria live in/on the rock, but this doesn't mean it doesn't live elsewhere just not in the same concentration.

I do generally try and explain my "opinion" when it differs from others to give the reader more information to base their decision on or to do more research.

You were correct it wasn't my intention and I will take what you wrote to heart and try and watch what I write so I don't dismiss others opinions or offend them.

I didn't take offense to this to don't worry about it. It was very well worded and plenty "delicate" enough. Feel free to PM me in the future with a little "smack down" if you see me do it again.

I owe you a beer or two for pointing this out to me.

Carlo

 

[RevClyburn]

in the words of the immortal Rodney King, " Why can't we all just get along", lol. You both have a lot of knowledge, and that's the basis for forums like this, sharing knowledge and experience with others. It doesn't matter how long one has been in this hobby, we can all learn more, it's always changing, always something new. Sometimes even the experts can't answer some questions. A 11 yr old told me how to set up my tank 11 or more years ago, a novice, but he knew more than I did then.

I respect both your opinions and ideas. Share what you both have, and learn also. That's the way it should be. So easy to just agree to disagree on ideas that don't match ours. It doesn't mean that your opinion is wrong, just viewed differently.

Sorry, if I stepped on any toes, if I did, I apologize. Just trying to kill this before it goes further and I have to find another board to post on, and I love this board and the people in this club.

just my 2 cents,

edwin

 

[Phyl]

Split from original thread to keep the original on topic.

 

[Phyl]

Just trying to kill this before it goes further and I have to find another board to post on, and I love this board and the people in this club.

Thread closed to prevent just that. Please take further conversations to PM. Thanks for your cooperation.