Paul B
NJRC Member
Most of us get cool stuff for Christmas and our birthdays but I am lucky as my birthday is actually on Christmas day.
Years ago I used to get a lot of presents because of that, but in those days everyone used to get more presents than now and that happens as we get older. We already have everything that we need so we get things like gift certificates for restaurants, Home depot, Regain, liposuction etc.
One big problem I, and I assume many older people have is we get a lot of electronics for gifts. Electronics don't work for old people and I honestly feel that feature is built into the device.
For instance this year I received from my wife a pedometer. I have been walking every day and I don't know if I am walking a mile or 20 miles so she got me this thing.
It is tiny and you wear it on your wrist. The "instructions" came on a piece of paper the size of those strips they put in fortune cookies and it is written in 5 languages none of which is English.
I just want the thing to tell me how many miles I walked and maybe the time, but that is an option I don't really need as I am retired and I don't care what time it is. I also don't need it to tell me what day it is because I am retired and every day is the same.
The device only has two buttons in it. One is marked "R" and one is marked "M".
I fooled around with it for most of Christmas day and it seems the "R" turns on a small light so you can read it after you fall in a storm drain because it is so tiny and you have to stare at it for a while and don't pay attention to where you are walking.
I think the "M" tells you how much weight Marie Osmond lost on Jenny Craig.
I am not yet sure how you can get it to tell you anything else but on the box it has all sorts of functions like your latitude, temperature, Blood pressure, footsteps, battery life, age of some rock singers, recipies etc.
So I wore it on my morning walk and all I can get it to do is tell me what time it is, in military time, but it is five and a half hours off. (I haven't yet used the function about Marie Osmond's weight) I was in the military and even then the time confused me so the thing is a great conversation piece and it will be relegated to my electronics drawer where I keep all my electronic gifts from years past because I have no idea how to use them.
Another gift that will go into that drawer is a lens set for my cell phone so I can take better pictures. There wasn't even a fortune cookie piece of paper to explain how to use these things but I figured out most of them through trial and error. The only part of it I can't figure out is the little remote push button that is supposed to tell the camera on your phone to take the picture. It says on it that it has a blue tooth. I swear I looked very hard and can't even find it's mouth so that will never work.
View attachment 1945064
Also, what is this obsession with passwords? Why do I need a password for everything? I am running out of passwords and had to start using Greek Characters. Why do I care if someone steals my password for my electric bill? If you want to pay it for me, go ahead. Or my cell phone. If someone steals my phone and they don’t have my password, how would they call me to tell me where it is. I don’t keep any banking information on my phone because I don’t know how to.
Speaking of cell phones, I have an I Phone 4. I think they are now up to 42 or so. My wife keeps telling me I need to get with the times and get a new phone. But I think mine is much better than hers. . When she wants to make a call or ask the thing something, I hear:
Siri, call,,,,,,Siri,,,,Si,,,,Siri cal,,,,"Who do you want to call?"
Siri, Call Bob,,,,,,,,,,"Who do you want to call?" Siri, call Bobby Str......
"To make a call, you can say things like Siry, call so and so" . And it goes on like that.
Also her phone sometimes talks to her when she is not even asking it anything. Once we were in Church for a funeral mass. It was dead quiet as it is for most funeral masses. The priest was in a part of the ceremony that called for total quiet and no one was making a sound.
All of a sudden, from seemingly nowhere everyone in the church hears this blasting from my wife's pocketbook:
"I didn't get that. You can ask me things like When is George Washington’s birthday, How much does it cost to ride the subway, What is Bono's middle name, who was Julius Caesars accountant". Would you like to ask me a question?"
I have a really nice, simple phone and it is also nice looking. I am not sure what type of wood it is made out of but it always works no matter what.
When I want to make a call I just look up the number in my phonebook, which I keep in my back pocket. Then I put a dime in the slot and dial the person I want to call. It always works. (Only in my area code of course)
These electronic things also come in such small boxes that it doesn't seem like there is anything under the tree. I liked the old days when there were such big presents you couldn't see the tree. Like for instance one year I got a set of tires for my 1962 Pontiac Bonneville and once I got outdrives for my boat. Now those were some cool boxes.
Years ago I used to get a lot of presents because of that, but in those days everyone used to get more presents than now and that happens as we get older. We already have everything that we need so we get things like gift certificates for restaurants, Home depot, Regain, liposuction etc.
One big problem I, and I assume many older people have is we get a lot of electronics for gifts. Electronics don't work for old people and I honestly feel that feature is built into the device.
For instance this year I received from my wife a pedometer. I have been walking every day and I don't know if I am walking a mile or 20 miles so she got me this thing.
It is tiny and you wear it on your wrist. The "instructions" came on a piece of paper the size of those strips they put in fortune cookies and it is written in 5 languages none of which is English.
I just want the thing to tell me how many miles I walked and maybe the time, but that is an option I don't really need as I am retired and I don't care what time it is. I also don't need it to tell me what day it is because I am retired and every day is the same.
The device only has two buttons in it. One is marked "R" and one is marked "M".
I fooled around with it for most of Christmas day and it seems the "R" turns on a small light so you can read it after you fall in a storm drain because it is so tiny and you have to stare at it for a while and don't pay attention to where you are walking.
I think the "M" tells you how much weight Marie Osmond lost on Jenny Craig.
I am not yet sure how you can get it to tell you anything else but on the box it has all sorts of functions like your latitude, temperature, Blood pressure, footsteps, battery life, age of some rock singers, recipies etc.
So I wore it on my morning walk and all I can get it to do is tell me what time it is, in military time, but it is five and a half hours off. (I haven't yet used the function about Marie Osmond's weight) I was in the military and even then the time confused me so the thing is a great conversation piece and it will be relegated to my electronics drawer where I keep all my electronic gifts from years past because I have no idea how to use them.
Another gift that will go into that drawer is a lens set for my cell phone so I can take better pictures. There wasn't even a fortune cookie piece of paper to explain how to use these things but I figured out most of them through trial and error. The only part of it I can't figure out is the little remote push button that is supposed to tell the camera on your phone to take the picture. It says on it that it has a blue tooth. I swear I looked very hard and can't even find it's mouth so that will never work.
View attachment 1945064
Also, what is this obsession with passwords? Why do I need a password for everything? I am running out of passwords and had to start using Greek Characters. Why do I care if someone steals my password for my electric bill? If you want to pay it for me, go ahead. Or my cell phone. If someone steals my phone and they don’t have my password, how would they call me to tell me where it is. I don’t keep any banking information on my phone because I don’t know how to.
Speaking of cell phones, I have an I Phone 4. I think they are now up to 42 or so. My wife keeps telling me I need to get with the times and get a new phone. But I think mine is much better than hers. . When she wants to make a call or ask the thing something, I hear:
Siri, call,,,,,,Siri,,,,Si,,,,Siri cal,,,,"Who do you want to call?"
Siri, Call Bob,,,,,,,,,,"Who do you want to call?" Siri, call Bobby Str......
"To make a call, you can say things like Siry, call so and so" . And it goes on like that.
Also her phone sometimes talks to her when she is not even asking it anything. Once we were in Church for a funeral mass. It was dead quiet as it is for most funeral masses. The priest was in a part of the ceremony that called for total quiet and no one was making a sound.
All of a sudden, from seemingly nowhere everyone in the church hears this blasting from my wife's pocketbook:
"I didn't get that. You can ask me things like When is George Washington’s birthday, How much does it cost to ride the subway, What is Bono's middle name, who was Julius Caesars accountant". Would you like to ask me a question?"
I have a really nice, simple phone and it is also nice looking. I am not sure what type of wood it is made out of but it always works no matter what.
When I want to make a call I just look up the number in my phonebook, which I keep in my back pocket. Then I put a dime in the slot and dial the person I want to call. It always works. (Only in my area code of course)
These electronic things also come in such small boxes that it doesn't seem like there is anything under the tree. I liked the old days when there were such big presents you couldn't see the tree. Like for instance one year I got a set of tires for my 1962 Pontiac Bonneville and once I got outdrives for my boat. Now those were some cool boxes.